This is what writing a paper at Oxford looks like:

This is what writing a paper at Oxford looks like:

1. Sit down at my desk and clear the clementine peels.
2. Read a secondary source and take notes, then stop halfway through.
3. Go to the kitchen to make a cup of Nescafe.
4. Come back and "take a break" by reading entirety of the NY Times Style section.
5. Stare at my paper and finally type a sentence.
6. Rearrange said sentence more attractively.
7. Peruse the thesaurus.
8. Stare at the paper; move previously typed sentence to a different part of the paragraph.
9. Pace around the room, picking up clothes.
10. Eat a clementine.
11. Take another break and go out for a walk; get annoyed at judgmental swans.
12. Come back and stare at the paper.
13. Finally give in and read more Shakespeare.
14. Type a quotation. Satisfied.
15. Go to rinse out my mug in the kitchen.
16. Recheck the NYTimes and various blogs for updates.
17. Frustrated that nothing has been updated, obsessively check Facebook instead.
18. Delete a sentence.
19. Realize that thesis doesn't make sense and write a new one.
20. Overenthusiastically cultivate active hatred towards Shakespeare and tutor. Create elaborate fantasies involving piercing them on a college spire/drowning in the Thames.
21. Freak out about how unprepared I'll be for tomorrow's tutorial and calm myself down by eating a cookie and rearranging the pictures on my wall.
22. Wonder if I have ADHD.
23. Repeat.